Online Work and Racism
Why it can be hard to find peace and how to do so
Hello friends,
I love working online and remotely. It has all kinds of benefits. But one of the big disadvantages of the remote work lifestyle is that racism can follow you into your home.
Invading Your Sanctuary
When you work in an office and you're Black in plain sight every time you are outside, your home is your sanctuary, your oasis, the place where "they" can't get at you. It's often the only place where you can be fully yourself and at peace.
When you work from a home office, you're dealing with racism and microaggressions in your home. If a colleague gaslights you or a stranger Zoom bombs you, it can feel like there's no escape. Rather than home being a place to put it all behind you, you find that it continues to weigh on your mind. Every time you return to your computer or home office, you're back in that situation, and it can seep out into the rest of your home too.
That can also happen if you’re an activist, and the trolls are being particularly active or nasty. You might find that something happens to trigger you and you struggle to let it go. I know a LOT of people have been experiencing that recently.
Is there a solution? I don't know. Most advice about working from home talks of separating work time and space from home time and space. Mostly this works, but good luck doing that in cases of racism. If you're the kind of person who plays situations over and over in your mind, as I am, you'll find it an effort to lift your thoughts out of the mire.
How to Heal
So, what can you actually do to help yourself feel better, and start to heal? Here's what I've tried when it’s happened to me:
Accept that the thoughts will come and try to let them pass through without holding onto them. That's something I've learned from meditation and it often works.
Distract yourself with something else that you love to do that preferably has no association with what you're trying to forget. Reading is always a go-to for me, or sometimes watching a trashy program I'd usually avoid.
Write it out. I don't journal much any more, but I write regularly. Some of that makes it to the newsletter. Some doesn't, and may show up in a later book. But it's also ok if nobody else sees it. The act of writing is healing for me.
If you’re the kind of person who can shout, scream and cry (sadly, I am not) do that if you need to. You’ll definitely feel better after an emotional release. (This is not medical advice, just my observation.)
Talk to someone you trust and work through the feelings. That can also be hugely helpful!
Finally, know within yourself that the immediate pain and angst will pass. You may not forget what happened, but its immediacy will fade and you’ll be able to carry on.
If you have experienced racism remotely, what works to help you heal?
Thanks for reading,
Sharon
© Sharon Hurley Hall, 2022. All Rights Reserved.
I am an anti-racism writer, a professional B2B writer and blogger, and co-host of The Introvert Sisters podcast.
I don't know why I waited until today to read this.
A couple of weeks ago, in a meeting with a consultant for my organization, she asked several questions that Isure she wouldn't have asked a Caucasian individual and to add insult to injury, she expected me to answer her on demand.
She also had the audacity to speak with my immediate supervisor and say 'Esther didn't have much to add to the conversation and I think she could use some training.' My supervisor was truly disgusted with the whole conversation and said, 'I'm so sorry that you have to work with her. I had to stop her from using coded language several times. If you don't want to meet her again, I'm on board with that.'
My executive director initially tried to coach it as 'what's it that you could learn from her.' When I pushed back and stated 'it's impact > intent.' She understood, however, offered to sit in on these meetings and I politely declined. Don't need a buffer or a 'savior.'
What I want is the opportunity to call this woman out and use the conversation as a teachable moment.
Anyhoo, it took several hours to process this and to let it go, even though I had support. What I'm trying to do now, is to remind myself that my home is my sanctuary and refuse to allow any of that toxicity in.
I'll put an immediate stop to it, document that it happened and let my supervisors know immediately.
Thanks for this valuable article!
That's awful, Sharon. I've been fortunate in that my work does not often require me to invite clients into my space. The one person with whom I do interact regularly is a wonderful human being.
I just looked up Zoom bomb and all I can say is, damn! That absolutely sucks to be accosted in such a way. If the Zoom company can't figure out how to secure their connections, that's an opportunity for their competitors to step up.
I bet if technology could trace these miscreants and the FBI showed up in THEIR homes with handcuffs, that mess would stop quickly.