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Hello {{ first name | friends}},
There are moments that stand out to every woman racialised* as Black. One such moment is when you see another Black woman visibly disrespected, and it happens a lot.
Earlier this year, we saw it in the US when Bruce Fischer refused to shake Vice President Kamala Harris' hand. That very public, high profile disrespect - and what looked like loathing - mirrors what happens often in organisations and public spaces everywhere, and it's not limited to the US, either.
Examples of Disrespect
As Black women, we've ALL experienced versions of it in a variety of settings:
The people who look at your hand then ostentatiously ignore it
The people who shake your hand then wipe their hand as if you were diseased
The shop assistants who don't want to take money from your hand
The shop assistants who drop your change on the counter rather than put it in your hand
The people who assume you don't know anything about whatever the topic is under discussion and start to whitesplain it to you
The people who visibly recoil when they see you
The people who make assumptions about what's available to you
The people whose assumptions mean they consider you less capable, less comfortable or simply less than
And these are just off the top of my head based on what I've personally experienced. I'm sure there are many other examples, too.
Why This Happens
Sometimes white folx don't even know why they're doing it. And sometimes they do, so I'm not giving them an out here.
This is the result of centuries of othering where people racialised as white enslaved people racialised as Black, made that condition permanent and heritable, and created a mythos to go with it, one part of which was that Black people were inherently savage and/or diseased and should be "handled" with care. The whole point was to separate us from what was deemed to be humanity (though how on earth it could exclude us I don't know.)
When we say race isn't real but racism is, this is just one example of what we mean, because the end of enslavement did not mean the end of the pernicious and harmful ideas that went along with it.
Let me say that again: the end of enslavement did not mean the end of the pernicious and harmful ideas that went along with it.
Some of those harmful, othering ideas are deeply entrenched in white folx minds (and in the minds of some people of the Global Majority too, but I'm not going there today.)
Any time you automatically view a Black person as suspicious or out of place, that's what's going on behind it. If that makes you feel uncomfortable, I urge you to sit with that and reflect on it for a while.
Black people, I see you and I feel you. I have had these experiences and they sting and annoy every single time. It is truly heartbreaking that these harmful encounters are still happening, and with the rise of right-leaning voices, they may happen more often. Sigh.
Taking Action
And so, to action. Here's what would-be advocates and accomplices racialised as white can do about this.
First, check yourself - is this a reaction you've ever had? Do you know why you had it?
Second, train yourself - remind yourself in these circumstances of our common humanity and treat other people, people racialised as Black, as you would want to be treated yourself.
Third, speak up - let others know you see this and you won't let it stand.
I don't know if this will stop it from happening - I doubt it will, not for a long, long time - but noticing and taking action to be intentional about recognising people's humanity in every interpersonal interaction is a good start, isn't it?
Thanks for reading my perspective,
Sharon
*Race is a made up concept; however, the harm done by racism is real.
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I am an anti-racism educator and activist, the author of “I’m Tired of Racism”, and co-host of The Introvert Sisters podcast.
© Sharon Hurley Hall, 2025. All Rights Reserved. This newsletter is published on beehiiv (affiliate link).
